We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
