Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
Randomize