What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize