I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
