Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Randomize
