i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
