I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize
