Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
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