you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
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