he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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