We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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