that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
My vagina is officially offended.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize
