Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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