And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Randomize
