you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
my sisters under your porch take her home
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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