If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Randomize
