1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Randomize