would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
I have already put on my inside pants.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
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