WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
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