OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Randomize
