Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Randomize