Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
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