You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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