what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
