yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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