Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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