I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
