I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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