And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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