Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
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