Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Drake has all the answers
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Randomize
