he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Randomize