You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
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