You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Randomize
