I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
Randomize
