I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
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