is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
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