what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
