these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Randomize
