Duck Duck Cougar?
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
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