I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
I don't think brook has ever known best
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
