woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Randomize