I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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