How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
this beer tastes like vomit already
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
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