She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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