Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Your topless pictures make me question reality
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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