Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
I'm having to shit out rocks
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
