I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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