i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Randomize