all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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